I've been helping a young friend with his application essay. I guided him away from general story-telling and encouraged him to write more specifically about what he did and thought. I've corrected grammatical mistakes and sharpened up his use of "not only . . . but also" and a few other stylistic things. I pointed out cliches and suggested he find his own ways to express those ideas. But I haven't changed his words or his ideas. He has phrased some things rather awkwardly, but has also come up with some striking ways of expressing his ideas. I think it really sounds like his voice. He's happy with the essay and he's thrilled that it's DONE! If I were editing this for publication, I'd do a lot more to it. But I'm not.
My question here is this: What are admissions folks expecting to read? I think it will be obvious that this was written by an 18yo guy. Isn't that the point? I think it's a great window into his ideals and work ethic. But should I do more? Fix the awkwardness? Thanks.
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